First post ever on tumblr, I though I’d start with a bang. The other day I read a Buzzfeed article on 40 Questions All White People Need To Answer and got to thinking I’m half white let’s if I can shed some light on the situation.
1. Why do white people call gucamole “guac”?
Well, people in general love shorten words for no apparent reason. The worst is cucumbers to cucs. Ugh.
2. Why do white people like bearded men and horses so much?
I can’t help you with the horses thing, cause I don’t get it either. It must be some white supremacy bullshit thing. As for men with beards, they’re fucking hot. Deal with it!
3. Why do white people like comparing arm tans
Because it’s always shocking that we become any other colour than pale white.
4. Why do white people like cheese so much
Because commercial and companies have been telling us that we love cheese since we were kids. Cheese = North American Life
5. Why do white people like to explore attics?
I don’t know about all white people but I’m a curious person and attics have a ton of history in them. I like learning and finding cool shit, sue me.
6. Why do white people like the sand Dunes so much?
They look pretty?
7. Why do white people like Kiss?
I’m assuming the band, well they’re four cool dudes that hide their identity with unique face paint. Also, Kiss is a major part of rock and roll history.
8. Why do white people like the woods so mucn
Nature is nice? I don’t know.
9. Damn, why do white people like pumpkin so much.Pumpkin pie, pumpkin latte etc…
Well, it’s delicious.
10. Why do white people like playing in the snow. Snow is cold.
I’m a Canadian, snow is kind of a huge part of my life. Plus you can do so many cool things in it-skiing, sledding, snowboarding, snow ball fight, building a snowman… Do you wanna build a snowman? It doesn’t have to be a snow man… okay bye
11. Why do white people like Drake so much?
I don’t like Drake as an artist, personally rap isn’t my thing. But I can respect a guy who was in a wheel chair on Degrassi - You go Jimmy!
12. Why do white people like hummus so much. it’s literally chick peas.
Don’t know, why do you like ice cream? It’s just milk.
13. Wait why do white people like shark week so much?
SHARKS ARE AWESOME!
14. Why do white people like candy corn so much.
Gross, I hate candy corn. I don’t get it either.
15. Why do white people like ray ban wayfarers so much
Well, they make cute hipster glasses and I need glasses to see so…
16. Why do white people like going to abandon houses or other places like have you not seen horror movies.
We have and that’s why we go. As terrifying as it would be for a psycho to pop out and try to kill us, it’s the thrill that gets you every time.
17. Why do white people like putting their bare feet on the dashboard
I hate when people do that, it’s dangerous. One day some one will go through the windshield feet first, and hopefully learn that you’re a dumbass.
18. Why do white people like to their own strawberries so much?
Picking your own fruit insures that it’s not covered in bugs or half eaten. Plus you can eat them while you’re picking them.
19. Why do white people like to cuddle so much during storms?
Cuddle + mood light of a storm = sex
20. Why do white people like nutella so much
It’s hazelnutty goodness that taste awesome with peanut butter.
21. Why do white people like kissing dogs in the mouth?
Gross, just gross.
22. what is a “color run” and why do white people like them so much.
The colour run is the happiest marathon there is. Instead of just running 5k, you get to run while people throw things of powdered paint at you. It’s fun.
23. Why do white people like to hunt ghosts?
Cause I ain’t afraid of no ghost!
24. Why do white people like avocados so much
They’re healthy and good for your skin.
25. Why do white people like Christmas music so much, that shit gets annoying.
It does but it’s catchy as hell plus brings on all the feels of X-mases past.
26. Why do white people like that Thrift Shop song so much?
It makes them think they are cool.
27. Why do white people love hot glue
I’m a cosplayer and hot glue has saved my life. You can fix pretty much anything with it.
28. So why do white people love full house so much idgi
I grew up with it on, plus Uncle Jesse was hot.
29. Why do white people make instagram account for their pets
Not only instagrams but twitter and facebook accounts as well. But I find more Asian do that for their pets than white folks.
30. Why do white people put their kids on leashes
So it appears like they have some control over their children, news flash they don’t.
31. why do white people love mason jars
It brings us back to our farming roots? IDK
32. why do white people love the beach so much
The same reason we like the woods, nature is awesome.
33. Why do white people dance like this though
Ouch, that was some horrible dancing. Well because they actually think they look cool.
34. why do white people say “idear” instead of idea?
Cause they’re hicks.
35. WTF is gluten exactly and why do white people hate is so much
Gluten is a protein composite found in wheat and some grains. White people assume by cutting the gluten they’ll lose weight.
36. Why do white people love “turn down for what” so much
Once again, they think it make them cool or black.
37. Why do white people love cooking with beer so much
Beer is amazing and anything doused in alcohol is delicious.
38. why do white people always say ‘have a good one’ have a good what?
Well, I mean have a good evening/afternoon/morning/day. And we say it to be polite.
39. Why do white people gotta be climbing everything
40. Why do white people say ‘for Pete’s sake”?
I believe it’s an alternative to saying for Christ’s sake.
Well, that was a hell of a lot longer than I expected. I doubt anyone will read this but it was fun.